My Thoughts on “24 Ridiculous Divorce Lies…” by Dr. Karen Finn

As I was reading her thoughts I decided to choose 3 “lies” that I could relate to…

1-“It takes one year for every four years of marriage to get over your divorce” Karen Finn

I am so glad that this is a lie.  I was married for 37 years.  That means it would take me nearly ten years to recover.  It has been four years since my husband left.  I am doing much better.  Am I completely recovered?  No.  I am over him but not the betrayal.  That will take a bit more time, at least for me.  I think everyone’s journey is different.

2-“You’ll get over your divorce quicker if you just avoid thinking about it.” Karen Finn

In this section, Karen mentions health problems, anorexia, and anxiety attacks.  Yes, I struggled with all of the above in the beginning.   The emotional pain was so intense that I did have issues with anxiety and depression, which I never had in the past.  One of Karen’s “24 lies about divorce” is that everyone who goes through a divorce will have depression.  Luckily that is not true.  Although, I am one who now knows how terrible depression is.  The upside is that I can now relate to folks, on some level, who struggle with depression.

I believe you do have to think your divorce and do your best to deal with it.  I think to move on you have to be honest with yourself and others.  For me, I hope I can use my experience to help people on the same path.  That is why I share my story to let people know they are not alone.

3- “There is something wrong with you if you feel like part of you died when your marriage ended” Karen Finn

I agree with Karen this is an absolute lie.  When you have been betrayed by the one that promised you and God that he would love you forever, it is like part of you died.  Here is my quote…

“Divorce is like a death but with intent”  KathieyV


Please check out the rest of Karens list of “24 Ridiculous Divorce Lies..” Check out her profile site on Your Tango.

Thank you Karen for your insight.  You are helping many of us as we navagate our new lives.  I am excited to move on to a better and happier life:-)

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Hi, I am a mom, nana, and writer living in the beautiful state of NC. I was married for 37 years and then blindsided by my husband, a former pastor. After decades he filed for legal separation without a word to me. It has been a rough road coming to terms with this new life that has been chosen for me. My blog is a place where I share "The Beginning," this place I found myself, a place I did not want to be. "The Journey," the things we need to do as we traverse this new road. Lastly "The Joy," and yes there is still joy to be found even after great pain. I have finished my first book "My Story My Divorce God's Promise, The Beginning." I am in the process of writing The Journey and The Joy. Please join me on my adventure to a new life. Always remember God's Promise "I will never leave you or forsake you."

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