“I would not have enough to survive if I did not have my lawyer to protect me.”
(Disclaimer-I am not an expert. This information is just based on my experience and may not work in your situation.)
I remember when I was first thrown away the shock I felt left me feeling off balance and confused. I did not know what I should be doing so I did nothing. Doing nothing was probably the most damaging thing I could have done.
In my mental fog, I remember hearing the same advice from nearly everyone I encountered. “Don’t sign anything,” Hire an attorney.” Well, I did listen, and I did not sign anything, but I was slow in hiring an attorney. In my mind at the time I could not endure the effort it would take to initiate this process I did not think I could deal with further stress. I was wrong in this decision it only made things worse. I did finally hire an attorney.
Part of my hesitation came from the simple fact that I did not know who I should hire. I prayed for help with this decision. I asked everyone I came across for suggestions on a good divorce attorney.
I talked with three lawyers. The first was around $200/hour. Very nice person, not a divorce attorney, she told me she could not help me, and the best thing I could do was cut my losses and move on. After 37 years of marriage, I felt like I needed some type of compensation for the broken promises. I did not hire her. I spoke with one lawyer who said their fee was around $700/hour so I knew I did not need to take the conversation any further.
As I continued my search one name kept coming up. This person was highly suggested by many people who had gone through a divorce themselves or knew someone who had. So I made my decision to hire her.
I remember my fear at the prospect of our first meeting. I was entering into an experience I had never dreamt of encountering, and I had no idea what to expect. I had been given a separation agreement by my soon to be ex, (which I did not sign), I took this document to my new attorney. As I understood it, she said that there was no thought of me and my future in this document and that we could do better.
I had thus started my journey into the court system. She gave me assignments immediately. First off she walked me outside and pointed to my bank and said for me to start there. Next, I was instructed that I needed to set up an appointment with a local PI which I did. She worked on the subpoenas for credit cards, bank statements, and eventually hired a digital forensics specialist and set up a deposition. It was a scary, crazy ride but in hindsight a necessary one. I now know so much about the man I thought I knew and I have alimony to help me survive.
Reasons to hire an attorney.
They run interference for you and protect your rights.
A good divorce attorney makes sure you get your fair share.
They know how to handle the paperwork.
They remain objective and are your advocate.
They will help you avoid mistakes, such as signing something that would harm you.
I am sure that there are some that can get through a divorce without an attorney. I read about the amicable divorce online quite often. But the people that cross my path who have gone through a divorce have found that the advice of an attorney was necessary. Some I have met have regretted not hiring an attorney.
If you decide to secure an attorney, I suggest you shop around, that you interview prospective attorneys. I too recommend you do this sooner rather than later so that you are better able to protect yourself.
Remember God walks beside you on this challenging journey. Keep in mind His promise that He will never leave us or forsake us.
God Bless You!
“For by wise guidance you can wage your war, and in
abundance of counselors there is victory.”