I never thought I would be thinking about dating again in my 60’s. I thought I would be retired with my husband, enjoying our grandchildren and taking trips as a family. That dream did not pan out because my husband of nearly four decades walked out on me. So is online dating for me? Let’s take a look at what I know.
First, I thought I would look at some of the dating sites out there. I found an article on the Observer called 15 Dating Sites for Finding Matches over 50, 60, and 70 Guide to Dating Websites for Older Adults.
Here is the list of their top 10 sites
Top Senior Dating Sites, By Type
- Best overall, largest user base – eHarmony
- Best dating site for 60+ singles – SilverSingles
- Best site for Christian dating over 50 – Christian Mingle
- Best casual dating site for seniors – Senior Friend Finder
- Best dating site for educated professionals – Elite Singles
- Best mature dating app for Jewish seniors – JDate
- Best over 50 dating website in the UK – OurTime
- Best senior hookup site for flings – Senior Sizzle
- Best Catholic dating site for senior citizens – Catholic Match
- Hand selected matchmaking service – It’s Just Lunch
- Best 100% free dating site – OkCupid
It looks like eHarmony is their top site. They state that it has the largest community of seniors online. Silver singles are, according to Observer, their second choice. I don’t qualify for many sites, such as JDate because I am not Jewish, Catholic Match because I am not Catholic, and Senior Sizzle is not for me because I am not into casual hookups…yikes.
I have been on a couple of the dating sites. When my husband first left me, I had this enormous hole in my heart and decided to fill it with dating. I signed up for OurTime. It did not feel right to me, so I did not go on any dates. In the book I am working on now, I say don’t let the devastation of divorce change who you are. I felt if I followed the dating path at that time that it would be a sharp change in who I was, and I did not want that for my life.
I recall one encounter, by online e-mail, on OurTime. The man I was talking to said after telling me he was disabled, paraphrase-“It would be so nice if you would take care of my family and me.” What? That was not what I was looking for in the world of dating. That was the last person I talked with on OurTime.
I did join Match for a while and talked to many people online and on the phone, but nothing became of these encounters. What I did find out was that online conversation is a bit deceiving. People I talked with online sounded perfect for me. Once we started phone conversations, it did not take long to figure out who they were, and many times, they had an agenda that I wanted no part of.
When I ask the question, “do I want to date?” I have to say I am not sure. I am enjoying my life as it is, but yes at times, it is lonely, and I would love a partner. Maybe not so much a partner but a friend to share in my life and for me to share in theirs.
I may check out one of the sites just to fill in the lonely spots that Covid 19 has cast upon us. It would be fun to share my day with someone who is caring enough to listen. I would do the same for them. If I try another dating site, I think I would go with Silver Singles.
How about you? Are you on any dating sites? What luck or lack thereof has been your experience.
Take Care!
KathieyV
So on the slightly younger end of online dating (I turn 30 this year) — I think its pretty unanimous that online dating is hit or miss…. with a lot more misses than hits.
I remembered wanting to fill that void after we split & I tried but ultimately I needed to be by myself. I’ve had 1 semi-successful match and it only ended because he wanted a family and I’m not jumping to have more kids at the moment. The rest were all decent for a month or two before fizzling out. And now I’m much in the same boat… I enjoy my alone time but some days it would be nice to have someone other than my daughter to do stuff with.
I’ve found sites you pay for are more successful but I don’t need to waste $20/month for an app to tell me who liked me. If its meant to be we will match on our own
Hi Demi, it sounds like we are in the same mindset when it comes to dating. I was very active on Meetup and I was meeting alot of very nice people. That was my best social outlet. I thought if I were to meet someone it would be through enjoying activities such as hiking, photography and many more fun groups I found on Meetup. I was not really looking for a relationship though, just more of finding friendships. Now with Covid all activities have gone virtual. When things start to open up again you should check out Meetup you may find the perfect group for you.
I hope you and your daughter are doing well. Happy New Year!
Kathiey
Yes Covid has put a damper in things… luckily here we are still able to do some regular things. Unfortunately it seems the age group I’m in– tends to be that hook-up culture and I’m not about that life lol. Thanks I hope you’re doing well despite this. Happy New Year
I am not into that either Demi. Luckly I still see my kids and grandkids. I can’t wait till things open up. Take care of yourself, stay healthy. I am first in line to get my Covid shot when it is my time.